Our Little Cowboy!!!!!!!

The other day when we went to get Clay's glasses I bought him this outfit that I fell in love with and well today was the day we had our photoshoot!!!!!!!!!!! He is such a cutie (if I say so myself)!!!! It is still so hard to believe that God has blessed us with such a wonderful child. I am so thankful God has rewarded us with him. We love our little boy very much and every heart ache and delay that is mentioned and described here has been worth it!!!! Thank you, Lord, for our son and the people that loved him first and for his birthmom wherever she is that you will bless her too!!!! Amen.

PLEASE, be praying for everyone as adoptions are on hold right now in PGN. Please be praying they will all bring their children home, soon, and then for Guatemala and their children as adoptions are not taking place and that solutions will be made. All children need a forever family!!!

Dreaming.....

We are dreaming once again. We are dreaming of the day that comes and there are no more social workers and we can go home. I love going home. Right now, after being away our house needs some TLC and the yard needs some landscaping, but when I see it it is the way I will always see it. We dont have a big house. It isnt a new house, but I love the ranch style it is and having enough land to one day build on. Not a lot mind you. A craft room, Ham Radio room, Hot tub off our bedroom and even a play room that will grow with our child(ren) as time goes by. When I see it now. I see it at different times during the day. I see it really early in the morning, you know when the day is beginning to show light and the sun hasnt yet started its daily ascent into the heavens. I am waking up and out of my window in our back yard there is a mama deer and little ones quietly chewing on the leaves at the edge of the woods. Every once in awhile you will see the mama deer stop lift her head and quietly listen, listening for danger. They stay there eating until they decide they have had enough and back towards the back creek they run. The cows from our next door neighbors can be heard on the wind as it blows gently, and there I stand at the bedroom window amazed at what God has created. If it is time to get up and Matt to be off to work it is now time for my day to begin. If not and I just got up for nothing I would head back to bed. Later in the day and morning chores are done I head toward the back deck and look out towards the back and just soak up the peace and quiet and look at the green trees and blue sky and clouds all as clear and bright as can be outside my home. Sometimes I go out front and set on the steps and watch the road thru the trees and just take in the peace that comes. Yes, our road can get busy out there but far enough from the road it isnt noisy. Inside my house is cozy and warm it allows plenty of sun and I can open the windows and let the fresh air in. Even though, going to town means driving 20-30 minutes away I love it for it isnt so far away that it is a major ordeal but far enough away that I can enjoy the country (not so much anymore but still with 17 acres enough to make it so) and the city. All my friends are at home. They care about us in a way that my online friends cant do. They are there at a moments notice and I can be in turn. Our family is only 1.5-2 hours away and near enough that if need be can be there pretty quickly. Sometimes, I stay in town window shopping until Matt gets of work and I follow him home. It is usually getting dusky and you have to be careful and watch for bambi as you drive home so as not to hit him. Bambi loves crossing our roads at this time as they can blend in to the day and if going to fast hit them before you even see them. Then as you turn into our drive, it is covered over in trees like a canopy and go towards the house look again for you never know what is running across the drive. I love being home at night. The lights shining thru the windows and then after all is done taking a blanket laying it across the back deck and the two of us laying down and just gazing at the night sky full of stars and it is so pretty. It is like black velvet with small patches of white and it endless. This is the way it was. NOW, I dream of adding a german shepherd puppy, a large swingset, as Clay grows watching Matt and him choosing the perfect tree to build a Treehouse. Maybe if we ever have a little girl a play house in the perfect spot. In the house I can hear little feet running down the hallway screaming," Mommy, come see". Or chasing him down the hall saying the tickle monster is going to get you while he runs or crawls really fast laughing and getting to the end of the hall and just sitting there waiting on you only to try to craw really fast to avoid you as you get really near. All this and more is constantly running thru my head as things change where we are now. The leasing office dont listen when you complain cause the a/c isnt working right. The sounds at night when Matt is at work has changed. Our building is louder and people come and go and very few are the same. It is small and there is no room to put stuff. Everything has to stay locked up for fear someone will rob you blind or maybe they will ram you as they come thru the roads cause the speed limit signs are ignored and they dont watch. There is no quiet. You hear sirens and cars and trucks as plain as day thru the windows as they go along the highway and loud music playing in cars throughout the night. It is never dark enough to see the stars or what color the sky is. You smell smog instead of fresh air and I am homesick.

I don't know why I am writing this except it helps. We are praying so hard for a job that pays what we make here at home. We dont like wandering how much are they just not going to pay today and yet we have to stick it out till all post placements are done. Being told one thing and paying another. Yet, a job is needed for just a few more months here till it is all done and reporting what isnt right will just get you fired. I have learned that transportation industry no matter what aspect of it is all the same they tell you what you want to hear to get you hired then they do what they want, when they want and either take it or leave it. What I feel right now, I want to take our son home, I want him to be a little boy as long as he can and having room to run and play and have fun as children should do and even though I know what the first thing he is going to do is bring me a lizard to see I will be fine cause that is what boys do. I want him to grow up around cousins and family and know what that is. I want him to grow up loving God to the fullest and completely. I want him to grow up to be like his Daddy.

This is my prayer, to go home with our son completely 100% ours not having to be concerned with social workers. For Matt to have a good job where he is home with his son and I every night, But mostly just to make thru this time until we can go home!!! Tonight, I am homesick!!!!!!!!! Please, be praying.

New Pictures!!!!!!!!!

I love to sleep with Mr Monkey!!! In fact, I do it every night, too.

Me and Daddy in our boots!! Do you like my sweater? I do it keeps me warm!!!

Playing in Mommy's clean laundry can sure wear a little fellow out. One of the reasons Mommy calls me her "Little Munchkin"

Me sporting my new glasses, taken today!!!!!

We are coming back from a really good dinner at Outback.
We went there to celebrate Mommy and Daddy's 4th anniversary!!
I love people and made a lot of people smile telling them bye bye or hello on our way out.


While in the process of downloading pics and videos I found the videos will have to wait till I can take the time to go thru them. I have 76 from 12-15-2007 until 03-04-08 and I have to find one or two only to upload and share. Hope the pictures are enough for now. O yeah, one last thing this smile stays on my face now except when I really want out of my crib or I get cranky from being tired. Mommy about has it all figured out and I dont get cranky too often. Now all we do is wait till August to see what the eye doctor says about my eyes. Hoping we are one of the three or four that dont have to have a second surgery. Is this enough for now until I can get more pictures and upload the video or two???????

Another quick update!

Mommy and Clay, I was REALLY glad he was doing so well

Clay right after waking up


Clay working on second cup of juice

Things are going really good here. Clay had surgery on Monday the 21st and he did great. He slept all day Monday except for a little while at the hospital and then for 2.5 hours that evening. I was a very stressed mama. Mom and Dad met us here at our apartment and followed us to the hospital. We had to take Clay's Mr Monkey as he sleeps with it all the time. BY the way, it is still a tiny bit taller than he is but not by much. We got there early leaving in plenty of time in case of an accident on the way or anything in way of construction on 270. Since we arrived earlier we were allowed to have everything done earlier cause the child before us was canceled. I did well holding up while waiting and didnt really cry at all. I did a little after them taking my baby back to surgery. That was scary. He hasnt been home that long at and we are all just getting really adjusted to everything and here they were taking him away again!! I was so relieved when we got back from getting something to eat and the doctor walked in about 5 minutes later saying everything was fine and he was in recovery. At ten they brought him back and he was so little in that bed and the IV running out of his hand. He got a little fussy and I picked him up and as soon as I did he fell asleep on my shoulder and slept till they said to wake him and see if would take fluids etc. He was one thirsty little boy. He drank two sippy cups of apple juice!! Thank you all for praying for us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I broke down that night. I mean really broke down. For the first time since this whole thing started, I was crying for nothing and just a mess. I knew everything was ok. I knew he was ok and even though Matt was getting really sick and I was just then getting better it was really nothing to cry over. I was talking to Kim and well I am glad I needed someone to talk to. The only thing I could think of to explain it all is just needing to cry to let it all out. The whole process to get him home. The stress of having to let him go if even for a small length of time and finally in relief that he was really, really home and he was ok.





NOW let me do some real updating here: Mary is out of Family Court and in PGN, YIPPEEE!!!!! Praise God for that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jenny, Alex, and Annette are all back home and with their babies. Sonia is still in PGN and for all of you that only keep up with my blog PGN is on a hold again from what I am hearing. It is still all politics and (I am confused as I havent kept up with that as much since we have been home and having to learn, adjust to a new life and enjoy each other and getting well) something to do with CA which I thought was just to register with so that cases in process could continue under old law. Well, those of you that understand if want please post the actuality of what is going on in the comments so that readers here can understand and pray for you all as another bump in the road is occuring. We havent heard from Cory so I am guessing she is still in PGN waiting also. Kim is going to visit Zack over Mothers Day and please be praying they find all is well with him!! Clay since the surgery is doing more than ever. He has started taking steps un assisted between the coffee table and couch and short distances when Matt or I was in the floor playing with him, but today he began in earnest walking between us and ended up walking the entire width of the living room to us with only turning around and going back. It is not going to be long now till he is totally walking. He is no longer afraid to sit down from a standing position, before he would do so only if holding onto something. The dr says it probably has to do with he had no depth perception before and now he does. We went and got his new glasses Friday. They are so much lighter, the lens are thinner, and there are no nose pieces as they used what they called a saddle for the nose piece and he is wearing them all the time and today Matt caught him trying to take them off twice but that was it and he didnt do it again.





Matt went to the doctor on Wed and was told to stay home from work to let the antibiotics take effect as she couldnt tell if it was severe case of bronchitis or pneumonia. He is off for a few days beginning today and not have to go back to work till Wed. Please be praying as he is sick and pushing himself hard. He returned to work on Friday night even though still major tired and not feeling good at all. He is feeling somewhat better today. Please pray they give him his sick time this time!!!!





Tomorrow is our 4th Anniversary and as of now we dont know how we are going to spend it. As I am feeling better and Matt is beginning to feel better I am going to update with Pictures soon. I have to download the new ones from my video camera and will post. I have to find my manual and charger in order to do so but I will soon. I know that you want pictures. I will post the few I have from the hospital after surgery. They arent that great but will work until I can upload the others and I will also try to upload the video of him right after bringing him home!! Thank you for reading my post and I will be posting pictures soon. Thank you for your prayers they are greatly needed!!!!

Quick Updates!!

I am so sorry it has been this long since I updated my blog. I had every intention of posting some pictures and giving updates, but life took over and I am just trying to get something in here so no one thinks I forgot about them.

April 6-9th we went to see family. Beginning Sunday April 13th I got really sick and have been since then. In fact, REALLY sick with bronchitis and this is the first time felt like doing anything on here.

March 31st, Joanna found out here baby is perfectly fine and nothing is wrong. Praise God!!!!
In the last couple of weeks Annette has her Visa appt in the morning, Jennie has her Visa appt Monday morning and Alex got word Tuesday that her Visa appt is Wed morning. All three will be home next week with their babies.

Please be praying Mary receives word soon that she is out of Family Court and is resubmitted to PGN. I dont know where Sonia and Cory are in process other than in PGN last I heard and please be praying out soon. Kim is back in PGN since the 7th or so of April and please be praying that Zack comes home soon!!!!! Thank you all for your continued prayer support for my friends.

NOTE: Please be praying for Clay, Matt and I. Clay is scheduled for surgery to correct his eyes on Monday and just please pray for him to stay well and for everything to go great!!!! For Matt and I for strength for during and after this. Thank you all for your prayers!!